In the land of fangirls
by A Dash of Yellow
Summary: Tom Riddle messes with the Writer, which results him being thrown into Fangirl land. Will he surrvior thier perverted minds? Will the Mary-sues get him? Will the fangirls take over the fandom? Will Natalie ever have mercy on him? Probably not.
1. In which Tom insults Natalie

**A/N: Me: In honor of my most faithful reviewer, FreakyD45663, I'm making this story. She gave me the idea about Tom being chased by fangirls. I just rolled with it. **

**Tom: What me being chased by who? **

**Me: Shush Tommy Natalie is working. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing in the Harry Potter realms. I wish i did, but I do not. They belong to the wonderful J.KR. **

**Chapter 1 **

In a town near Kentucky, Main, and California on an unnamed street there was a indescribable girl sitting on a tan couch in her split level home. Next to her was a tall boy with jet black hair and matching black eyes. He flipping through a large boring looking book, that made the girl want to go to sleep just looking at it.

"So," said the girl, "Wanna play Guitar Hero?"

"Sure," the boy shrugged as he switched his book for a plastic guitar. " Can we play crushcrushcrush?"

"Why not." She said in a bored voice. As she strummed on her guitar the music started to play. Tom Riddle played on expert while she was stuck on easy. Her clumsy fingers kept on missing the notes, while Tom hit every single one. He seemed to find this rather amusing and felt to taunt the girl further.

"Aw, wittle Natalie having difficulty? Or is 'difficulty' to big of a word for you?" he said in a baby voice.

" Shut up Tommy boy." She grounded her teeth together as she attempted to hit some difficult notes. Which resulted in her missing over half of them, which made Tom laugh some more.

"Oh you think that's funny don't you?" she snarled at him.

"Hey if you thought sticking me with Luna Lovegood and listening to her talked forever about some made up animal was funny I can laugh at you sucking at the easiest game ever." As he said this he wasn't even looking at the screen, whist still hitting ever single. Cause in Natalie to turn red from anger and embarrassment.

" Says you with your ridiculously long fingers."

"Your just jealous." He was still scoring a perfect score and still not looking at the damn screen. Poor Natalie was barely getting a 85. As soon as they strummed the last note, their scores showed up. He got a 100 , she got a 72. Seeing this she threw the guitar at Tom, to let off some steam. Which resulted in hitting him in the head and a lot of cussing on his part.

"This is why no guy wants to date you. Your too damn aggressive." after he was finished insulting someone's mother and said a not very nice word beginning with a 'f'.

"That's it!" Natalie yelled, " a new story!"

"WHAT!" he screamed, but just as Natalie snapped her fingers he disappeared.

He reappeared on an empty street. Above him the sky rumbled, a warning that a storm was about to come. The houses around him were plain looking and seemed like no one was living in them.

"Hello?" he called, "Umm anyone here?" a trash can behind him fell with a crash causing him to jump in the air. He started to walk through the small town. He passed libraries, small stores, and a city hall; all of them were empty. He stopped at an empty shop window and looked inside. He could have sworn he saw a flash of red. He gave the shop one last glance and started to walk towards the park. He walked in silence for a while till he heard some giggling.

"Natalie?" he swirled around and stared down the street. He slowly turned back around when the laughter started again. Louder this time. His pace quickened as the laughter grew closer. And closer and closer and closer. He was running now and fear seemed to radiate off of him. He looked over his shoulder just as he fell over something small.

"Oh sorry." He said, still distracted. A small cough made him turn around. There stood a girl around twelve. He had out of control frizzy orange hair and sickly pale skin. When she smile up at Tom he could see she had braces trying to tame her buck teeth.

"OMG!! IT'S TOM RIDDLE!" she screamed in a nasally voice.

"Umm Do I know you?" he asked as he slowly backed away.

"Omg, like I'm Carol. I'm like your biggest fan. I've liked made so many fanfics about you. But like everyone says they are Mary-sue but their like totally not. I like mean so what if she can change into four different animals and like her eyes change with like her mood? Like who cares? Oh do you want to come over to my house I like made a shrine of all your pictures and stuff." Her dull blue eyes looked up at him.

"Uh," he seemed like he didn't know how to respond to a girl having a shrine of him, " Listen I loved to, but I really have to get back-" he didn't finish his sentence as he stared to run as fast as he could in the opposite direction. He could hear Carol calling his name as he ran towards the Library. His feet hit the white stone steps as he ran up them. He didn't stop till he was safely inside the library. It was completely empty, just as he hoped it would be. He walked through the tall bookshelves till he ended up in the history section. He pulled down a random book and started to skim through it. _'Tom Riddle was a lonely orphan at….' _He snapped the book shut at this and looked at the cover in shock. It read _'Tom Riddle. Crazy killer or lonely orphan' _he threw down the book like it was diseased and walked over to the bookshelf.

"No." he said in total disbelief. Every single title had to do with him. _'Tom Riddle, lost boy of Hogwarts.' 'Tommy Riddle, the boy who just needed a hug.' Tom Riddle and what really happened in the Chamber of Secrets.' _The library doors opened suddenly as a crowed of girls were herded in. They all varied in age, some looked like they were nine and other went as far as twenty nine. Tom discreetly hide in the shadows of the bookcases. The group walked towards a group of chairs that Tom hadn't noticed earlier and most of them sat down. Five of them walked up onto a raised platform. One that looked like the leader stepped forward towards a podium. She had mousy hair and a pinched face.

"I call the fangirls club meeting to order" she said in a throaty voice, all talking ceased. "I would like to start by saying I took a test on the Internet, which we all know never lies," there were murmured agreements at this, " and it said that I was the perfect match for Tom Riddle out of the Harry Potter guys." Their was applause at this as the girl bowed and took her set.

Another girl stood up, she was tall and skinny with stringy yellow hair. She had sea blue eyes and bad acne. "I would like to open a debate on the Ginny/Tom parings. I just don't think they are right for each other." At this some girls stood up and started to throw things at the blonde, others agreed with her loudly and that caused the others to start a fist fight. The mousy haired one stood up and argued with the blonde. Suddenly the Carol girl stood up and shouted above all the others.

"HEY!" everyone froze in whatever position they were in. They looked at Carol for a moment, waiting for her to speak. In the shadows Tom stiffened _'This can't be good.' _

"I would like to make an announcement!" she stood up on a chair and smiled down at her fellow fangirls. " Today is the day we have been waiting for. I saw Tom Riddle this morning on my was home from Marvolo Academy. I even _spoke _to him. My sisters our prayers have been answered. Now I say we like hunt down Tom, and have our fangirl way with him." The crowed roared with applause and they started to carry Carol to the stage.

"Is it true? Have our dreams come true?" asked the blonde.

"Like yeah totally." Carol squealed in delight.

"well were is he?" mousy demanded.

"Well.. I-I-I."

"WHERE IS HE?" screamed the crowed.

"I lost him." She mummer.

The crowed gave a roar and picked up the girl. Over the noise Mousy yelled, "Kill the traitor!" the group started to carry the girl out of the library. They were chanting, "Kill kill kill kill kill kill.' Tom was smiling at this point because he's sadist like that. He was in the middle of a daydream with involved gasoline, a match, Carol and a watermelon as the group passed him. Carol was none to gently turned on her side. She spotted Tom hiding in the shadows.

"THERE, THERE HE IS!" she scream using all capital letters again. The group stopped and seemed to turn at the same time. Their eyes fell on Tom and they just stood there for a moment.

"Umm Hi." He gave them a little wave, "Listen I need to get back to my house so if you guys could like give me a plan ticket or something?"

"Get him" they screamed in unison.

"Shit." And he started to run.

**A/N: Me: Ha. I'm evil. **

**Tom: ……..(absent cause he's in crazy town with the fangirls.) **

**Me: well who do I talk to now? Let's have Harry here. **

**(Harry Potter suddenly shows up in a towel and wet hair.) **

**Harry: Hey.**

**Me: Your my new narrator cause Tommy's gone. **

**Harry: Okay. Can I get dressed. **

**Me: No. **


	2. Oh when the Sues come to town

**A/N: Me: Well I'm back from my trip!**

**Harry: Your grandparents freak me out. Your grandpa was intimidating. It was like I was meeting the Godfather. **

**Me: Yeah he tends to do that. **

**Harry : So Tommy boy gonna get tortured in this chapter. **

**Me: (Grins evilly, causing Harry to take a few steps back.) Oh you'll see…… **

**Harry: I'm scared. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. **

**Chapter 2 (2 days later) **

"I think he went this way!" screamed one of the many girls after Tom Riddle. They ran past an empty ally an into a bakery. As soon as their war cries faded into the distance a trash can top popped up to reveal none other then Tom Riddle.

He stealthily climbed out of the trash and removed a banana peel from his shoulder, with a look of disgust on his face. Suddenly the girls ran out of the bakery and into the street again. Tom hid behind one of the metal cans as they passed. His usually glossy black hair was caked with dirt and standing up on end. His dark robes were wrinkled and had muck splashed across it. His dark eyes that in the past only held arrogance were filled with fear.

"Natalie?" he whispered into the darkness. He moved deeper into the shadows to give himself more cover. "I know that you can hear me. Get me out of here."

No answer.

Suddenly flames jumped up from behind him. The girls had stared a fire to help find him. That or they just wanted to destroy more things. Crazy psychotics.

Tom walked over to a chain fence and stared to climb it. Sweat dripped off his forehead as he lifted himself with some difficulties.

"Why is the fence so high? Is it not enough that psycho adolescents want me to do unspeakable things for them, or to them," He shuddered in disgust here, " But why does the fences have to be so God Damn high."

"Cause your a retard." Said a voice on the other side of the fence.

"Natalie!" Tom cried., "Thank Merlin."

"Hold it Tommy your not out of the woods yet." She grinned up at him from the ground.

"What do you mean?" He huffed as he hopped to the other side and stood over her.

"I mean I was hurt deeply at your remark and taunts." She said with mocked sadness.

"Natalie, what are going to do?" he said as he backed away slowly as she grinned impishly.

Natalie drew in a large breathe then screamed at the top of her lungs, " He's in the alley! OMG TOOOOM RIDDLE.

" Damnit." He cursed as the fangirls rounded a corner and screamed in delight. Natalie grinned at him evilly, but then in a flash of an eye she vanished. Tom couldn't figure out how she kept on doing that, though because of the mob that was heading his way. He grabbed onto the fence again and pulled with all his streghth.

"He's getting away! Someone corner him." Yelled one of the psychos.

As Tom reached the top of the fence ,however, three things happen a once. His robe got caught on the fence, the girls cornered him and finally Tom lost all hope.

"Tommy," one of them cooed, "Why don't you come down here."

"I rather like the view up here." He called down in a small voice.

"We just want to talk." Another gushed. The girls laughed at this.

Tome wisely choose not to respond to that.

"We might have to use the Sues for this one." The mousy one whispered to her fellow fangirls. A few muttered agreements at this and slowly back out of the alley. There standing at the entrance of the alley was four of the most gorgeous woman Tom has every seen.

The crowd slowly parted for them as the walked gracefully down the alley.

One was as pale as the moon and had long midnight black hair that was perfectly straight. Her eyes were as blue as sapphires and held a dark past. The one to her right was a pale blonde with the usual clichés of hair as golden as wheat and lips as pink as rose petals. The others were basically the same except one had green eyes and tan skin. And the last one had blue eyes with crimson blended in. Tom was frozen still as he watch them progress slowly down to him.

"Tommy!" the cliché blonde one squealed. At the name 'Tommy." Tom discreetly stared to pull at his robe, trying to get it untangled.

"Ah yes milord." The dark one bowed to him, while the others danced around in delight.

Tom was not fooled by their appearance though, many times he watched Natalie surf the net and weed out Mary-sues. He pulled harder at his robes.

"Do you need assistance?" one of them said as she suddenly appeared in front of him.

Tom gave a strangled cry at her sudden appearance.

"I'm Weather Golden. You fall in love with me in fourth year as I help you on your way to becoming the Dark Lord Voldemort. I'm one of you most faithful servants until I suddenly have an revelation and got to the side of Light. I kill you later on." she informed him with wide green eyes.

She was leaning in towards him.

"That's lovely." Was all Tom could say to his future murder. He instinctively leaned farther away from her. Suddenly she was kissing him passionately on the lips as a round of 'Aws" made its way around them. Tom broke away gasping for air.

"Bloody hell women I just met you!" he said as he wiped his mouth clean of Sue germs that might later infect him.

"But we are meant to be!… until I murder you that is." She started to cry and even then she was beautiful.

"Um.." Tom said some what awkwardly.

"Don't mind her Milord." The dark haired one whispered into his ear.

"How do you guys keep on doing that?" he cried as she randomly turned up behind him.

"I am Rose sunset winter lovely cold river Potter. I'm your most faithful servant" she purred as she wounded her arms his chest.

"That's great that really is, but-" Tom stared.

"I'm not done yet with my life story!" she told him rather crossly. " as a child as was abused by my parents the Potters. They didn't want a daughter they wanted a son." Tears silently made their way down her pale checks. " But then as you came to their house on Halloween night you kidnapped me, instead of killing me. You took me up as your apprentice. I have perfected the Dark arts by the time I reached three years old. I also learned karate and nine different languages when I reached eight.' Rose took a breathe to continue her story but Tom cut her off.

"First off why in the hell would I care what the Potters did to you? Second off them beating you up would seem highly unlikely seeing as that would be totally OOC for them. And Third how could you have learned all that in that small amount of time? You couldn't have mastered the Dark Arts 'cause that took me over sixty years to even get half way through them."

Rose gave Tom a funny look. "I'm a _Mary-sue _of course I can do all that."

"But it isn't even believable!" Tom protested in outrage.

"Thomas," one of the quieter ones purred at him, " why don't you come down? We can talked this over back at headquarters."

"and who would you be? Marie Anne perfect angel lovely firewood Ratchet and Clank opossum tiger Netflix Jujubes whore Yahoo catering elephant jade Mansion?" he taunted her.

"Actual I'm just Jade." She gave him another confused look. " Marie is back at the HQ if you want to meet her though." She added brightly.

**A/N: Me: sorry I haven't updated for awhile my computer crashed and I was like " M&# F! . You God damn #&#!." and other variations of that. **

**Harry: ( asleep) **

**Me: I need a different back up muse. **


	3. And You Would Be Here Why?

**Me :( Walks up on stage whistling then sees the audience.) Oh come on did I really take that long to update?**

**(Some random person hands her a piece of paper) **

**Me: (Opens it) HOLY HELL I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN THREE MONTHS! (Faints) **

**The long awaited third chapter**

Lord Voldemort is afraid of nothing, however, Tom Riddle is about to piss in his pants. The fangirls had taken him back to their headquarters. They had blinded folded him, so he had no idea where he was or how to get out. Tom trembled as he walked around his cell. It was a nicely furnished cell, with tasteful tan walls and a beige carpet. A small bed was in the corner with a light blue comforter and matching pillows. Towards the front of the cell were bars that he occasionally glanced out of. His hair was a mess as the Mary-sues manhandled him down into their prisons.

"So what's your name?" a smooth voice asked.

"What?" Tom snapped he hated being interrupted while he was wallowing in self-pity.

"What's your name?" the voice pronounced slowly.

Tom walked up to the bars, he snaked his hands through so they were on the outside.

"Tom Riddle, you?"

"Edward Cullen. Those are my brothers over there," he indicated to his right where two figures were slumped over, shaking.

Edward himself didn't look to good, his shirt was torn with dirt stains and his hair was a rat's nest on top of his head.

"Wait I thought this town was dedicated entirely to me?" Tom questioned.

Edward snorted, "That was very egoistic of you."

Tom scowled at him, "Well how the hell is I suppose to know everything I just got here three days ago!"

Edward raised a perfect eyebrow at him, "Two days, really? How did you mange to that? And without powers too!"

"What do you mean without powers?"

"When we enter this realm, were at the mercy of the Writer. She decides what powers we have and powers we don't take me and Jasper for example, the Writer decided to allow us our mind-reading and empathic powers, but we were denied 

our vampire strength, sight, smell, hearing, thirst and agility. And Harry over there," he gestured down the hallway where two green eyes stared out vacantly, "he isn't able to perform any magic, so now he just mopes in his emoness. So I just assumed that your powers were taken as well." He clasped his hands together, a superior look in his golden eyes.

"Trust Natalie to come up with that," Tom mumbled under his breath, "But what about this place?"

"What about it?"

"Well why are you here? I thought his town was solely dedicated to me."

"Did you really think that there was only one town? There is many towns' young Thomas, all dedicated to one character in any fandom. This underground prison connects all towns to each other; I believe Erik was forced to make them under strict supervision, of course."

A wailing sound came from down the hall, the impressive echo the place had made it seem as though a thousand people were wailing at once.

"Oh Shut Ron, no one gives a damn," Harry snapped as blood poured down his wrists.

"Shouldn't you be dead by now?" Tom asked as a large puddle of blood pooled Harry's feet.

"I can't die in this wretched place!" he wailed.

Tom slowly scooted to the right, away from Harry's cell.

Say Edward-." Tom started, but was cut off.

"Oh-No," Edward whispered horrified, his butterscotch eyes widening.

"What?" Tom asked as he started to panic.

"_Their_ coming."

"Natalie!" a shot woman with blonde hair snapped at her daughter.

"What?" the girl snapped, her eyes not leaving the computer screen as she typed furiously. Muttering things like 'Three months!' and 'They must think I'm dead!'

"Honey you haven't been outside in a while, and you only come out of you room to eat. I'm starting to worry."

"Mother it has been THREE months since I last updated, no leave me!" Natalie swiped her hand though the air in an irritable fashion.

Her mother didn't budge, "You haven't played with your dog in a while, and I think he's starting to miss you."

"Yeah sure I'll get to that later," she responded absent mindedly as she tried to think of a reason why Edward Cullen was in the story.

"Natalie-."

"Aha!" she screeched triumphantly as she began typing furiously again.

Her mother jumped ten feet into the air at her daughter's sudden outburst. She slowly backed out of the doorway as Natalie started to mumble to herself again.

"That girl needs therapy." She said quietly to herself.

**Me: Well I spent, like two days locked inside my room trying to finish this crappy chapter. I'm sorry if the answer to the whole 'fan country' thing wasn't clear. If any of you guys have trouble understanding it, I'll try to make more sense of it in my next chapter. **

**Now I have a few disclaimers to make. First I do not own anything from Harry Potter, the Twilight series, or The Phantom of the Opera. The only thing I own is the plot and my psycho fangirls. **

**On another note the reason I didn't update soon was, I left tow, then I got a new laptop, then I left town again, then school started, then I failed a Physic test, which I have no idea what the hell the point of that subject is, the I got obsessed with Phantom of the Opera for a while, but now I'm back on Harry potter so it's all good. Then I typed up this story and realized it was like only a page and a half long so I added that pointless bit about me and my mom at the end, an actual conversation between us, which I will probably delete. So in short I WILL NEVER TAKE THISLONG TO UPDATE AGAIN! ss**


	4. You want me to do what?

**Me: What do you know an updated that didn't take forever and a day three hours and 37... No wait 38 minutes. :) **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything except for my insane fangirls, Mary-sues, myself, and the plot. **

**Chapter 4**

"Edward, what do you mean 'their coming?'" Tom hissed, his hands tightening on the bars.

The chants of the fangirls entered the tunnel, bouncing off the walls so there was no escape.

"It's time for your initiation Tom," Edward stated in a dead voice.

"Initiation? What the hell is that suppose to mean?"

"Do you remember what fangirls write about?"

"Yes," Tom cautiously said.

"They want to make it reality," His butterscotch eyes shot around in the darkness, as if expecting an attack.

Tom gasped, "No."

"Yes."

"Oh Merlin Edward help me!"

"I'm sorry Tom there's nothing I can do," He slowly started to retreat back into the shadows.

"NO!" Tom wailed as he crawled in the fetal position.

The girls drew nearer, and he started to suck on his thumb, losing what little sanity he had left.

"Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom," They chanted as they stopped in front of his cage.

"Oh, Tommy!" one of them swooned.

A woman in her twenties licked her lips as she opened the door, the girls rushed in. Tom was still in the fetal position when they picked him up and carried him out a well placed door.

He started to writher in their clutches, put they tightened his grip on him so he could not even move an inch. Tom went limp, maybe if he didn't move it would be over faster. He stared vacantly up at the starry ceiling, the bright stars blinking down at him in a sea of fangirls. His breathe came in short gasps as they threw him in a dark room. He saw them shut the door, plunging him in darkness. Hands came out of nowhere and grabbed his wrists, he felt cold iron incase them.

'_Oh God their kinky!'_ he thought to himself. He cringed as the hands slowly wrapped themselves around his torso.

Suddenly a blinding light filled the room; blurry shadows slowly came into focus as his eyes adjusted to the sudden assault his eyes were under.

A thin girl with pretty blue eyes leaned over the stainless steel table and stared at him, her head cocked to the right.

"Macy would you please keep your hands to yourself, we don't need Thomas distracted right now." She said in a calm voice.

Tom saw a glimmer of hope, maybe there was someone sane here. The arms around his chest slithered away and Macy came into his view. She was a chubby, but not quite fat, girl with golden blonde hair that curled slightly at the end. She was blushing when she sat to Tom's eyes, avoiding eye contact.

"Now Tom," the girl said, drawing his attention away from Macy.

There was a sinister sparkle in her blue eye that he didn't like.

A large map appeared from thin air in front of them; on it were countries labeled, 'Fangirl', 'Fan', 'Mild Fangirl,' and 'Obsessive fangirls'. There were also smaller countries like, 'Fanboy', and 'Obsessive Fan, but not Fangirl'

(Fan Republic for short). Little red lines were drawn all over the map, crisscrossing over Towns that were crossed with a giant red X.

"What is that for?" Tom questioned as he leaned over farther.

"A Map of the fandom, we want to take over. And you're going to help us"

**A/N: Me: Bet you weren't expecting that? **

**Erik: Why am I here? Shouldn't I be over in the Phantom of the Opera fandom? **

**Me: Well Harry's in Fangirl land right now because he was the worst muse I have ever had, so you're here for lack of a better option. **

**Erik: Well that makes me feel so loved.**

**Me: Always a pleasure. For those of you who are confused by Edward's words of 'They want to make it reality' I meant they want to make their stories the only stories out there, taking away the fandom from all other fans. Now on a more serious note As my American readers know Elections are coming up I just want to remind anyone over the age of 18 to vote, and on a totally different note, 'Happy Two day late Halloween.' :D**** Also I have a new poll up, please vote, me and my friends are betting how close you guys get. **


	5. Oh, Well That Wasn't Obvious

**A/N: Me: So Obama won, any thoughts? **

**I don't own Sweeny Todd (see A/N), Harry Potter, or Twilight. I only own a ticket to the Fox Theatre and the plot.**

**Chapter 5 **

"You're taking over the Fandom?" Tom repeated in disbelief.

"The Harry Potter one, to be precise. Originally we were going to go for Twilight, but when Breaking Dawn came out there was no need." She started calmly as she.

"You can't take over the Harry Potter fandom!"

"Oh, but we can Thomas, and we will." She slowly walked around the table.

"What do you need me for then?"

This stopped her; she paused for a second, as if thinking it over.

"You are a muse, correct?"

"Yes." He said slowly.

"You can somewhat control people's thoughts and persuade them to write certain plots, yes?"

"Yeah," he said, still not getting the point.

"My God Thomas! Did the air in the cellar make you an idiot?" she rolled her eyes and then slowly said, "We need you to persuade the writers to write like us. Do you understand?"

"Yes I understand." Tom snapped.

"Good. Now what do you say?" she smirked confidently.

"No." Tom's eyes flashed red at her cockiness.

Her tan face fell for a split second, than a hard look came to her face.

"I really think you should reconsider." She spat out through gritted teeth.

"I don't think I should." Tom crossed his arms, looking satisfied as she fought hard to gain control

She let out a shaky sigh, "So be it."

She clapped her elegant tan hands once. A roaring filled the room as the fangirls charge into the room. Tom gave a startled cry as they lifted him up and carried him out of the room. He could see Macy whispering urgently into her ear, before the door slammed shut. Tom twisted and turned, but the girls soon grabbed onto his ankles and wrists. They led him down to the cellars, whist chanting 'This is for your own good Tom' in an eerily flat voice. They literally tossed him into a bare dirty looking cell and locked the door behind him. They stood there for a moment, staring at him, before turning in unison and marching down the hallway. Tom sat for a moment, until he heard the distant sound of a door closing. He scrambled to his feet and ran towards the door.

"Edward." He hissed through the bars, his onyx eyes searching the dark.

"Yes?" Edward's familiar shadow appeared from across him.

"Did you hear what they want to do?"

"Unfortunately, we need to get out of here Tom. Their planning on ways to get you to help right now. Trust me none of them are PG rated or fun." Edward spoke urgently.

"How? If Erik made this prison there's no way we can get out without walking into a torture chamber."

Edward was quite for a moment, "There has to be a way." He muttered to himself.

Both he and Tom were quite, when a voice spoke from the corner.

"The Plot hole Exit." It said.

"What?" Tom and Edward asked in unison.

"The Plot Hole exit. It's a door that authors put in their stories when they can't think of a reason of how someone can escape."

"And where exactly would this Plot Hole door be?" Tom asked.

"Right behind you." The voice seemed to be getting fainter, as though the person was walking away.

Tom turned on his heel and searched the dark prison. He didn't have to look long because there was a big flashing obnoxious sign over it saying 'Plot Hole Door here!'

"Oh, well how did I miss that?" he muttered to himself.

"Wait! How am I supposed to get out?" Edward cried, his hands shooting through the bars his ghostly white palm reaching for Tom.

"You're not the main character in this story, plus your fandom isn't the one that's being taken over." With a sadistic little wave Tom opened the door and forever closed the Plot Hole door on Edward and his wailing forever. Or maybe not.

**Me: Okay I was going to update sooner but I, for some reason unfathomable I started to watch Sailor Moon up to like episode 100. I remember waking up on the weekends and watching that show. Ah good times. So that was two days ago and I was going to update last night but I got to tickets to see Sweeny Todd at the Fox in St. Louis. So I got in a car with my people and we went for a ride down to Missouri. It was amazing I love Sweeny Todd and the actors were great. By the way anyone that is passing into St. Louis should totally go to the Fox theatre, it's so amazing I love the artistic architect of it, okay enough of my love of the Fox Theatre. **


	6. With Out a Trace

**Me: Well I seem to making a habit of dropping off the face off the earth. **

**Erik: Yeah thanks a lot for the past week and a half I've been hearing you swoon over pretty boy. **

**Me: I cannot help that I'm a girl and he's really hot. **

**Erik: and a total jackass.**

**Me: You're just jealous that he has a nose! (Sticks tongue out)**

**Erik: (Punjabs) **

**Me: (suffocates) **

Disclaimer: I own the plot and all OCs. Oh and this pencil! (Brother walks up and takes pencil) Okay scratch the pencil part.

"Dude I totally gave him a head shot!" screamed an extremely pissed off twelve year old.

This in turn pissed off his older sister.

"Shaun, I swear to God If I hear one more word about Halo 3 ripping you off. I'm going to rip off you head, put it on a pike and dance the conga around it. Understand?" she said through gritted teeth.

Shaun just continued to play with his game council, which as we all know is the most important thing in the world. Natalie sighed and continued knitting the blanket for her baby cousin. Naturally she couldn't get far though because her insensitive muse burst through the door.

"Natalie!" Erik screamed as his yellow eyes peer anxiously out of his mask.

"Om My God it's like you people have a mission to make sure my cousin freezes to death." She screamed as she threw down her needles.

Erik, who seemed unaware that he was about to be torn apart piece by piece rushed down the stairs to Natalie. He bounced anxiously on the balls of his feet, he twisted his hat with his bony hands as he wait for Natalie's attention

"Yes Erik?" she sighed impatiently.

"Natalie, muses are disappearing. I was just up at brunch with Hermione and Dumbledore, when they both just disappeared.

"Are you sure they didn't get called away by their Writers?"

"At first I thought that too, but then their Writers called me and asked where they were." Erik's sunken yellow eyes seemed to glow brighter.

"They just vanished out of thin air!"

"How could they have vanished? It's near impossible for a muse to vanish. They are bound to their Writers! The only way you can steal one is if….Shit." Natalie's eyes widened as she checked her laptop.

"What?" Erik asked.

"They can't." she whispered.

"Who can't? What can't they do?"

Natalie seemed to have stop breathing, "Go to Tom. Now, we need him back here!"

"Natalie what is it?" Erik cried as he shook her shoulders.

"Their taking over." She whispered to herself in horror.

"Who's taking over?" Erik demanded.

"Bad! Fic writers that's who! Mary-sues Gary –Stus, butchers of the English langue, Trolls, and rabid fangirls."

"No."

"Yes, now go!"

Erik nodded and vanished with a flash of bright light that was enough to give some kids seizers.

Natalie blinked as the last of the black spots vanished from her sight.

"Always the one for dramatics." She muttered to herself.

She wrapped her arms around herself, "Okay There's no need to panic yet Natalie. Everything will be alright. Erik will come back with Tom."

Five minutes later Natalie grew more and more anxious.

"Where they hell could they be."

Suddenly her laptop made a weird noise.

"Oh it would be just my luck that this piece of junk would break on me." She walked over to the black laptop and checked what the hell was going on. Suddenly a large light appeared in the laptop screen, Natalie not thinking to clearly idiotically lean forward. Then a 'whooshing' sound filled her ears as she was sucked in through the laptop and onto a familiar street.

"Okay now's the time to panic," she whimpered as she looked around the setting that she herself had wrote.

Back at her house, Shaun was staring at the spot where her sister suddenly vanished. He was use to her talking to herself, and 'Erik', but a bright flash brought him out of his killing spree. He stared in shock at where his sister was sucked through the computer screen, a little bit of peanut butter jelly sandwich hanging out of his mouth.

"Mom?" He called upstairs.

**Me: There you go, sorry I was distracted by the fact that finals are in two weeks and I needed to get my ass into gear.**

**Erik: Great two weeks of memorizing how the American Government works.**

**Me: Hey that could actually benefit me in life. **

**Erik: Well seeing as how I live in France that's not really going to affect me now will it? **

**Me: Whatever, God you so cranky. (Returns attention back to readers) So if you guys want you or an OC of yours in this story for the war that will take place soon. Just leave a description of yourself and/or your OC. Hey even give me ideas for Mary-sues, but be sure to tell me which is which otherwise you might find your OC on the Mary-sue side. **

**Erik: So review! Including that one person in Lithuania that is reading this. **


	7. Tom Lost It, As Usual

**Me: I feel as if I should explain something to you guys. Erik is the Phantom from the Phantom of the Opera. He was originally written as a hideously deformed man with no nose, skeletal body, his eyes were so sunken in to his head that they just looked like empty sockets and the only way you could see his eyes was in the dark because they glowed yellow. He wore a mask to cover all of his face, not the half mask that most of you are familiar with. You should totally read the original book, it's really good. **

**Erik: I see you left out no detail there. **

**Me: Yep. **

**Disclaimer: I own the plot and my OCs. Everything else is not mine. And special thanks to ****the good dr. ****for letting me borrow his OC, Dale Franklin from his story ****International Police. **

**Chapter 7**

Tom ran down the street, looking over his shoulder every five seconds that made him look like he had a bad twitch. He kept to the shadows as he dodged in between buildings. He was carrying a broken broom handle in one hand, which really wasn't the best protection, but when your fandom is threatened by rabid fangirls, who also want to jump your bones, it's best to carry some kind of weapon. Tom breathing was ragged, although he hasn't been running very hard or very far. He peered around an office building corner entitled 'Riddle life insurance'. The street was abandoned, a tumbleweed raced across it like in a bad western.

"Tom," a voice whispered behind him as a gloved hand grabbed his shoulder.

Tom screamed like a little girl and swung around, the broom handle held like a sword in front of him.

"What the hell?" Erik said irritably, staring at the broom handle making him look cross eye.

"Erik?" Tom asked as he slowly lowered his 'weapon'.

"No, Anne Hathaway," Erik rolled his eyes, "Why are you so jumpy."

"You would be too," Tom whispered as he continued to twitch his head to make sure they really were alone.

Erik looked to his left then to his right, confused.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Shhh," Tom put his finger to his lips, "They are everywhere."

"Who's everywhere?" Erik asked loudly.

"Shhh," Tom grabbed the front of his shirt and dragged him deeper into the shadows.  
"The Fangirls," Tom whispered to him, his hot breath on his ear.

"This is uncomfortable," Erik tried to pull himself out of Tom's death grip.

"No you don't understand!" Tom sobbed, "They will find you and try to use you and do things"

Erik looked concerned at his co-muse, "Did they do 'things' to you?"

"No, I got away," Tom let go of Erik and crawled up into a ball instead.

Erik stood their awkwardly patting Tom's head.

"We should probably leave," Erik said carefully, afraid Tom was going to go insane again.

"To go where? Natalie's still mad at me. I have no powers, and whole bunch of psychos are looking for me." Tom mumbled into his knees.

Erik sighed, "Tom, the place is abandoned. I've walked around the whole town looking for you and I saw no one."

"They are in the walls," Tom exclaimed, running a hand through his hair, his eyes twitching.

"Tom I think you should take a sedative," Erik said as he took some pills out of his pocket.

Tom jumped up and looked at him, shocked and angry.

"You're in league with them aren't you?" he said as he pointed a finger at him dramatically and backed away slowly, "Yes, I see now. You want me to get paranoid so my emotions get the better of me, then you can strike when the time is right!"

Tom was foaming at the mouth and generally scaring Erik. This is really quite a feat to scare a man who is an Opera Ghost and possibly one of the most dangerous men alive or dead, depends on how you look at it.

"Tom, it's me Erik. Remember, we help Natalie write stories," Erik held out his hands to show that he was harmless and took a step toward Tom.

"Natalie?" Tom muttered under his breath.

"Yes, Natalie. She forgives you and wants you back."

"Wants me back?" Tom said in disbelief.

"Yeah, we miss you. The stories aren't as good if you aren't in them." Erik was three feet away from him now.

"Natalie," Tom whispered, "She's the reason this is happening. It's all her fault!"

"Now Tom, how could she possibly predict how this would turn out? It's no one fault except the fangirls."

"Oh take her side, eh?" Tom started to scream, "Well I'll show you!"

With that said Tom sprinted away from Erik.

"W…T….F," Erik said in confusion.

Meanwhile, Natalie was looking around the town. She was no longer in charge of the story so she had no idea why it was so empty. She cupped her hands up against the bakery and peered inside. She saw a half of a bagel on a china plate and a cup of coffee in a white cup. A thin layer of dust was on everything and cobwebs were forming on the brown tables.

"This is kind of creepy," she muttered to herself.

"Hey you!" a voice called behind her.

Natalie turned around and saw a guy coming towards her. She panicked and started to run.

"Hey!" he shouted as he started to run after her.

But although he was much faster than her, she knew all the nooks and crannies of the place. She turned into an alleyway with a dead-end.

"Aha!" The guy cried as he saw she had nowhere to go.

Natalie ignored him and pressed her hand against the way, muttered a few words, and disappeared.

The man came to a stop and cursed at his bad luck. Abruptly he was hit in the back of the head with a lead pipe.

"Where are they?" a voice demanded.

"Where are who?" he asked.

"Boy don't play games with me," Natalie threatened.

"I don't know what you're talking about, crazy lady!" he shot at her.

Natalie raised the pipe again and it came whistling through the air. This time it caught him in the stomach.

"Ow," he said as he wrapped his hand around his waist.

Natalie circled around him, the pipe held securely in her hands.

Abruptly the guys shot up and grabbed Natalie around the waist. He ripped the pipe out of her hands and threw her against the alley wall.

"Son of a Bitch." She hissed in pain.

"Who the hell are you?" he asked her aggressively.

"Natalie and you?"

"I don't think you're in any position to ask questions, Natalie" he said through clenched teeth.

"Listen if this is about me hitting you with a pipe-." She tried to choke out. His grip was really tight.

"Please, like that would hurt me," he rolled his eyes at her.

"Wow, lose the attitude," Natalie shot at him.

"STFU N0ob."

"Oh my God speak English." He tightened his grip on her.

"F- You," She managed to get out.

"Now you're going to answer my questions or you're going to die and I'm going to throw your body in a dumpster." He said as he pulled out a knife.

Natalie stared at him for a few moments, "Are you flirting with."

"Oh my God." He said as he dropped her.

Natalie rubbed the now forming bruise on her neck, "So what's your name?"

"Dale Franklin from the good dr.'s story International Police." He said shortly.

"Hi, Dale," Natalie smiled at him mockingly.

"Wipe the smile off your face before I do it for you."

"So violent." She commented casually, "So why are you here?"

"Hell if I know. I was trying to figure it out when you came running." Dale glared at her, "So what's your story?"

"Sent my muse to Fangirl land because he insulted me. Now the fangirls are stealing muse, trying to take over the Harry Potter fandom and I was sucked in through my computer screen."

He blinked, "Remind me not to get on your bad side."

"Duly noted."

They stood there awkwardly.

"Well let's not stand around here waiting for the girls to get us." Natalie started off down the alleyway.

Dale was right behind her, "How do I know you're not one of those 'girls' and you're going to take me to some evil British lair of yours?"

"Do I sound British?" She said in her southern accent.

"No, you could be faking it."

"You're paranoid."

"Within reason." He shot back at her.

Natalie passed through the brick wall, like it was water. Dale followed after her, still arguing.

"Hey don't walk away from me," Dale grabbed her wrist.

"Okay seriously dude, I'm not interested." Natalie ripped her hand out of his grip.

Dale stood there shocked, "I don't like you, you egotistic wench."

"Denial."

"Screw off."

They glared at each other, the hate almost visible. And no, this wasn't Ron and Hermione arguing love/hate. This was more of a Malfoy/Harry hate.

There staring contest was interrupted with Tom running through them, screaming something about a conspiracy.

"Tom!" Natalie yelled as she started to chase him.

"YOU!" Tom roared, turning around.

His eyes flashed red as he glared dangerously at her. Natalie stopped short and stared at Tom in disbelief.

"You," he whispered, looking quite deranged, "You're the reason I'm here. Unless," he laughed a manic laugh that Chuck Norris might consider scary, "You're just some illusion that the fangirls made up to trick me. Yes, yes I see what you're playing at now. This all ties in with Erik doesn't it? Oh I see what you're doing. Well I'm one step ahead of you Missy!" Tom threw down a powder that made a wall of fire and smoke erupt around him.

Once the all smoke disappeared, Tom was gone. Natalie coughed a little and rubbed her eyes in a futile attempt to make them less watery.

"Well crap," she exclaimed, "Tom's gone off the deep end and that's never a good thing when a resourceful wizard is mental unstable."

"He was stable?" Dale asked in surprise.

**A/N: Well hopefully the good dr. won't be too mad about how I wrote his character. Dale just seems like a guy I would love to aggravate. Although that wouldn't be wise seeing as he could kick my ass. So Will Tom ever regain his sanity (if he ever had it?), will Erik find his way back to Natalie? Will Dale and Natalie ever get along long enough to actually do something productive? Will the good dr. murder me? All these questions and more will may be answered next chapter, which will be put up in X number of days. **

**Next time I'll try to update faster, sorry I had three projects to do and I didn't have my laptop for a majority of my vacation. **


	8. Name Game

**A/N: I'm starting to like these once a month updates.**

_**Annually, more people are killed by donkeys than in plane crashes. Just thought I let you know. **_

"So what do we do now?" Dale asked her.

Natalie laid down the book she had been reading and rubbed her temples, "I have no idea."

They both sat at a round cherry wood table. They were unable to locate Erik so Dale suggested that they go to the library and do some research, 'Try to find out as much as possible,' as he phrased it. Two and half hours later, at least they thought it was two hours later; they seem to be living outside of time, they were at a dead end. Books laid scattered around them, Natalie's hair looked windblown for some odd reason and Dale's looked like he ran his hand repeatedly through it.

"I just don't get it," Dale huffed, "How are they stealing Muses? I thought it was impossible to do so."

"It usually is, because the bond between a Muse and an Author is really strong, you would have to completely annihilate it for the muse to be separated," Natalie sighed and picked up another book. She made a face as she looked at all the typos and abbreviations. Irt waz rlly annoyingzzzz.

"How exactly would they be able to tear down a bond," Dale asked with interest.

Natalie laid aside the book, which was titled '_Tom Ryddle fails in Luv," _and took a deep breath.

"There are a couple way you can break the bond, the only I know of a few that require the Author's consent. Either the Author can just not be as obsessed with that particular story, the Author dies, the Muse dies-."

"How can a Muse die?" He asked in alarm, "I thought we were immortal."

"No, you only live as long as your Author does, or if you are no longer mentioned in the story and the Writer has no use of you, you just…… disappear," Natalie said casually.

"So if my Author-."

"I highly doubt you will get killed off due to the fact that you're the main character," she said as she selected another on.

Dale looked slightly troubled by the fact that his existence is at the mercy of the Author's whim.

Natalie looked up at him, vaguely concerned, "You going to be okay?"

"Just a little shocked that my existence can end at any given time."

"It happens,"

"You're not that good at comforting people are you?"

"Hell no, I leave that shit up to my mom and grandma," she snorted as she skimmed through the book.

"That was a nice Hallmark moment," he mumbled.

They sat in silence for another twenty minutes when Dale's head shot up.

"Did you hear that?" he whispered to her.

"Hear what?" Natalie said at normal volume.

"Shhh," Dale silently rose from his chair, Natalie rolled her eyes and dragged her chairs feet across the ground making a noise similar to nails on a chalkboard.

He threw her a death glare and she just rolled her eyes again. He walked slowly over to the side of the bookcase that hid them.

"Natalie," he whispered, "There's someone there."

"Really?" She asked softly, she finally caught on that they were supposed to be quiet.

He nodded his head and creped around the corner, she followed. A beautiful blonde stood with her back to them, removing a painting from the wall. Dale motioned for Natalie to stop. They both watched in fascination as she removed the painting to reveal a safe hidden behind it. She stretched one delicate hand out and gracefully turned the combination lock. Under her breathe she muttered.

"20 to the right, 15 to the left, and 13 to the right,"

She swung open the heavy steel door effortlessly and slowly reached inside.

"Well go on," Natalie whispered to Dale.

"What?" he shot back.

"Go attack her, pull that ninja shit again,"

"No."

"Why the hell not?"

"She's a chick."

"You beat my ass without a problem."

"Yeah well she's a pretty chick."

Natalie's face turned a lovely shade of red. She swiftly grabbed a book from the shelf and hit him over the head with it. Unfortunately that made a loud 'Thump' noise, which therefore gained the blonde's attention.

"Whose there," she called out in a normal voice, no musical note to it, no 'it sounded like wind chime' description. Fangirl not a Sue.

Natalie steeped boldly out of the protection of the bookcase and into her plain sight.

"Tis I, Natalie, A Dash Of Yellow, Author of _Dear Diary_ and many more short stories that aren't quite as well recognized," she added a little bitterly at the end.

Dale rolled his eyes at her antics and walked forward, his hand outstretched.

"Dale Franklin," he simply said.

"Savannah," she smiled warmly at him, showing perfectly white teeth.

Natalie grumbled a little and pushed Dale out of her way.

"Hi Savannah, listen, we need some help," she started, but Savannah interrupted her.

"Oh," her large blue eyes opened wide, "You're here for the meeting right?"

"Yeahhh," Natalie said slyly a mysterious sparkle in her eye. "We got lost along the way."

"Well that's no problem at all, I was on my way to the meeting in fact, and I was just retrieving the plans." She showed them the scrolls she just retrieved from the safe.

Dale and Natalie shared a gleeful glance.

"Savannah," Dale purred, throwing an arm around her delicate shoulder, "You know you look absolutely stunning under these florescent lights."

"Thanks?" she asked with one eyebrow raised.

"Savannah, that's a pretty name," Natalie complimented, as she slowly inched her way towards a large purple vase that had Tom's life sketched into it.

"Thanks, it means 'Open Plain', my Native American ancestors-." Poor Open Plain never got to finish her sentence because snuck up behind her and threw a heavy vase at her head. Her sky blue eyes rolled up into her head as she gracefully fell to the floor.

"And my name means 'Born on Christmas Day' from my French people," she mocked.

"Was that completely necessary? We could have just taken the scrolls and ran," Dale shouted at her.

"Oh what ever lover boy," she snapped, "Now grab her legs so we can shove her in some random closet."

Dale grumbled, but complied, grabbing her jean clad legs and Natalie grabbed her arms. Together they stuffed her into an abandoned closest that looked like it had once been a shrine to Harry Potter.

"Sweet dreams, Blondie," Natalie laughed as she closed the door and locked the deadbolt.

"Alright," she clapped her hands, "Now that that's out of the way, let's see those scrolls." She held out her hand to Dale.

"What?" he asked a little disgruntled.

"The scrolls Dale, you were supposed to grab them."

"I thought you grabbed them."

"God Damnit, now we have to go down all those stairs again," she huffed as she stomped down the wooden spiral staircase.

Dale sighed in exasperation and followed behind her. She was muttered some colorful words under her breath, shooting a death glare at Dale every once in a while.

"Oh God, you have to walk down a flight of stairs, what are you complaining about?"

"I just sat in a chair for two hours, my ass is numb," she spat at him.

"Whatever,"

They walked down the long corridor, searching for the painting that the scrolls would have to be by. Within Five minutes they found it.

"There it is!" Natalie screeched as she ran in front of it.

"Yeah, but where are the scrolls?" Dale asked coming up behind her.

"You mean these scrolls?" a musical voice asked.

Slowly they both turned around and looked up to find gold eyes staring at them.

**A/N: Is it Edward? Is it Erik? Is it a Mary-Sue? What will Savannah do when she wakes up? **

**Sorry for the lack of updates, but I was sucked into the wonderful world that is the Vampire Chronicles, of course I'm not allowed to make fan fiction of that, Damn you Anne Rice. Ah well. **

**FUN FACT: Reviews make me update faster, also the voice for Bugs Bunny was allergic to Carrots. **


	9. Mr Spook

* * *

A/N: It's late at night, I'm so tired, but I can't sleep until the laundry is done and I still have three more loads. GOOD NEWS I'm on spring break!

**Chapter 9 **

Natalie's scream cut through the air, the empty halls magnifying it by ten times. Dale clapped their hands over their ears and moaned in agony.

"Will you shut up?" Erik snapped as he clamped his hand over her mouth, "My God you sound like Carlotta."

Natalie's eyes grew wide and she threw her arms around Erik, "Oh thank God it's just you." She pulled back and took in his appearance.

His shirt was torn and had large grass stains on them. His mask had been ripped off, so they had a full view of his skull like face and his black pants had a tear along the right side of his leg. It's essentially that you know where the tear is, no really it is.

Erik looked uncomfortable at her intense study of him and rubbed the back of his neck with one large graceful hand.

"Have you seen Tom?" was his fist question.

"Yeah, he was insane. I think I might have made a mistake sending him here," she said rather sheepishly.

"Ya think?" Dale interjected dryly.

Natalie's eyes narrowed as she glared at him, "I'm human, sue me."

"Yes, but this one mistake can cost us the fandom," he snapped back.

"Hey we have the plans."

"And what are we going to do with them? The Fangirls don't have them so they will probably have to make up so new plans."

Natalie was about to retort when the logic of it hit her. It was true they had the plans, Fangirls didn't. The only reason they wanted the plans was because it would tell them what the fangirls are up to, but without the plans being delivered to the fangirls, the fangirls would have to make new plans because they couldn't get to the plans that the trio currently have, which would render this entire mission a waste of time.

Natalie sat in silence for a moment, trying to think it through when Erik spoke up.

"Well that can easily be mended, Natalie will pretend to be a Fangirl and bring the plans to the Head fangirls herself. It would be an asset to us if we had someone on the inside."

"That actually makes sense," Dale thumped Erik on the back, Erik winced in pain and took care to move farther away from Dale.

"Whoa," Natalie exclaimed as she raised her hands, "let's not be hasty here, you know with _throwing me to the sharks" _

"Well why not? It's not like you're a horrible liar, seeing as you're a compulsive one."

"I have a slight problem with the fact that I am going to be in a giant crowd of fangirls and Mary-sues, who will probably use some freaky telepathic shit and see right through me."

Erik sighed and rubbed his head, "Natalie, you're just going to have to tap into your inner Fangirl again."

Natalie backed up, her hands balled into fists, "Oh Hell no, I left that _thing_ behind when I turned fourteen. It is locked in chains in the deepest recesses of my mind. No, I'll be damned before that happens."

Dale and Erik looked at each other before slowly advancing on her.

* * *

"I cannot believe you guys are making me do this," she huffed as she pulled at her pink chocker.

"Just stick to the plan and everything will go well for you," Erik said as he fixed her ripped jeans.

"I feel like such a poser," Natalie played with the fake nose ring as she looked in a hand held mirror.

"It's for the greater good."

"You know I pretty sure Dumbledore said that when him and his lover wanted to enslave the muggle race."

"This will end better," Dale's muffled reply came as he drew a tattoo on her arm in sharpie.

"Knock on wood," she mumbled, she took a deep breath, "Okay I'm ready."

"Good luck, and remember, if anything goes wrong just call for Dale, he'll be right outside in the bushes."

"That sounded really creepy."

"Just go," Erik pushed her out of the alley and into the busy street.

Dale and him melted into the shadows and soon Natalie could no longer spot them. She stumbled slightly on her heels as she tried to head to the main building, where every Fangirl around the world seem to be gathering.

"Out of the way!" a particularly mean looking one snapped as she pushed Natalie out of her way and continued to elbow anyone else who dare keep her from getting to the meeting.

"Jesus Christ, what a bitch," she muttered under her breath as she unsteadily wound her way to the marble steps of the auditorium.

Many girls were hanging out on the steps. Mary-sues sat near their Authors, fixing their hair or glaring at the ground whist slitting their wrists. Natalie continued way too many girls that seemed to have a glorified themselves close by.

Inside the place was not much better than outside, chaos ruled. Fangirls were getting into fights about their favorite ships (most of them OCxinsert favorite character here.) She half expected Puck to be floating above their heads throwing things down to instigate more fights. She ducked as a chair was thrown over head and scurried her way to find the head Fangirls and their Mary-sues. A small body bumped into her on her way to the stage.  
"Watch where-… Natalie?" a girl asked in disbelief.

Natalie stared in horror as she recognized her little cousin Cassie, who was just twelve years old.

"What in the hell are you doing here?" Natalie whispered, but that proved ineffective because of the noise that the crowd was making.

"What?" Cassie screamed.

Natalie seem to have forgotten her mission as she grabbed a fistful of her cousin's brown hair and dragged her to the bathroom. Together they ducked under unidentified objects as they were thrown their way. Whenever Cassie tried to struggle Natalie would just yank her hair some more.

The place was lit with bright florescent lights. Pure white tiles lined the walls, the floor was made up of plush red carpet and some couches lined the walls. Natalie had to admit, where the girls epically failed at writing, they at least had good taste interior design. A gang of girls were at the marble sinks, reapplying their 'Goth' make-up.

"Out," Natalie growled at them.

They started to glare at her but Natalie was fairly breathing fire. They seem to think better of making a mistake that would surly cause them their lives. They tried to look nonchalant as they strolled to the door, but another growl from Natalie sent them flying out of there.

Natalie threw her cousin the ground and muttered a 'stay' while she checked the stalls for any listeners. Then she stalked back to the door, Cassie scooted away from her as she grabbed a broom from the closet and stuck it through the elaborate golden handle of the door. Once she was satisfied by the fact that the place was secure she rounded on her cousin who was cowering by the marble sinks.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded.

Cassie stubbornly crossed her arms and her lower lip jutted out, "You're not the boss of me."

"Excuse me? Does Aunt Cindy know you're here?"

"Of course she doesn't" a very smug look crossed her face, but another fierce look from Natalie, and we are talking 'Tyra Banks would be proud fierce look' here, wiped it right off.

"How did you even find out about this place?"

"Oh it's been on the internet for weeks. All the major Fangirl sites had a whole bunch of blogs about it," she stammered, "Natalie I want to go to the meeting so if you don't mind I'll be leaving."

She stood up and walked confidently towards the door, trying to push Natalie out of the way.

"Oh I do mind," Natalie grabbed her arm and slammed her into the wall, the oil paintings of Tom shaking slightly from the force of impact.

Their noses were an inch apart; Cassie went cross eyed trying to keep eye contact with her.

"Now you listen to me and you listen good. I have a few questions to ask you and I want them answered true fully, got it?"

Cassie looked around her trying to find a weapon to fight off her loony cousin. Unfortunately the only weapon around was a vase filled with red roses that was placed five feet away from her. So she did the only logical thing that came to mind.

She screamed 'Rape' at the top of her lungs. Natalie clamped her hands over her mouth none to gently to make her shut up.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" she hissed.

Cassie's only reply was licking Natalie's hand.

"Ew," Natalie pulled back from her and wiped her hands on her jeans, "Cassie that was disgusting.

Her brilliant reply was sticking out her tongue, which really showed her maturity.

Natalie looked to the heavens, as if praying for some divine power to intervene and save her from having to deal with this. To her dismay, the powers to be were busy with other things so she was left to deal with her cousin who was trying to pull a Harry Houdini and escape.

Natalie placed both her hands on the wall, trapping Cassie. And then the interrogation began.

"Why did you come here?"

"Because I wanted to."

"How did you get here?"

"How did_ you_ get here?"

"I was sucked through my computer screen without warning."

"Same here, except I had a warning."

"Do you know who is in charge?"

Cassie snorted and rolled her eyes, "No one does, idiot. It's a _secret _mission. Key word being secret, duh."

Natalie resisted the urge to smack her, instead she asked as calmly as she could, "Do you even know what they have planned?"

"Yeah," came her snotty reply, " We're getting a muse and going to take over the fandom."

Natalie sighed and back away from her cousin. She proved to be no help what so ever. Hell, she was part of the resistance and she knew more than Cassie did. Natalie walked over to the sink looking in the mirror, trying to sort her thoughts.

In her reflection she could see Cassie non to discreetly inching towards the door.

"Cassie," Natalie sighed, "where the hell do you think you're going?"

Cassie froze for a second before mustering up enough courage, "I'm going to the meeting."

Natalie raised one eyebrow, "Oh? And who gave you the authority to do that?"

"I don't need your permission!"

Natalie closed her eyes for a second, Cassie took full advantage of her cousin's distraction and attempted to pull the broom out of the handle. But due to her haste she pulled too hard, the broom flew out of the handle; she lost her balance, and landed promptly on her backside with a painful 'thump'. Natalie looked at her cousin passively before walking slowly over to her and grabbing a handful of her shirt. Cassie naturally struggled but Natalie's age and height was an advantage. Without further ado she shoved, for the second time that day, another girl in a closest. Natalie picked up the discarded broom handle and shoved it in the door handle to prevent Cassie from getting out. Cassie was banging on the door, screaming at the top of her lungs.

Natalie clapped her hands together and pushed open the bathroom door. She was surprised to see a rather irritated bunch of girls standing in a line, almost all of them wearing a hole in the floor from tapping their foot too often.

"Um... You might not want to go in there," She smiled sheepishly when, as if on cue, the screaming reaches their ears.

Everyone exchanged uneasy looks and slowly dispersed. Natalie straightened her shirt and fixed her hair then marched confidently over to the stage to find the Head Sue.

* * *

Tom sat on one of the balconies, staring down at the chaos below him, a wicked smile on his face. He was clothed in all black; a thin stick that looked like her just snapped it off a tree was held in his right hand. He tapped the stick to his chin a thoughtful expression on his face.

"Well, Mr. Spook," he said to a sock on his left hand, "What sort of mischief can I get into with legions of Mary- sues and fangirls at my disposal?"

Tom lifted his left hand and made the sock puppet talk.

"Oh I'm sure we can think of something," 'Mr. Spook' said in a high pitch voice, his googly eyes rolling as Tom moved his hand.

"Yes, Mr. Spook. I am such a genius and you're so clever. I'm sure we can think of something together," Tom threw another glance down at the mob.

"Yessss, we most certainly can think of something," Mr. Spook joined him in looking over the railing.

* * *

**A/N: Yes I know I missed the March update, so I'm working extra hard to get you two chapters this month. :)**** In other news, to answer all of you people who are WTFing why my cousin is in here, I promise there is in fact a point beside the fact that she got mad at me for excluding her from the story. And yes I got her permission to mock her twelve year old self. **

**So Review, look I even made it semi-long. **


	10. A Setup

**A/N: Off of Spring Break, back to waking up at 5:30 every morning. **

**Chapter 10**

It was a miracle that Natalie was able to get through the crowd and what was more amazing is that she was allowed to go backstage. Sues were running around with mikes set upon their perfect hair, speaking rapidly into them. Some were standing off in the corner meditating or worshiping some dark god, Natalie couldn't tell. She sighed to herself and closed her eyes.

She was walking down a deep dark hallway with cobwebs spread throughout the ceiling. She stopped in front of a heavily locked room and took a deep breath, bracing herself for what was about to become. With a shaky hand she conjured a key from thin air and put it into the lock. She hesitated for just a moment before she turned the key and opened the door. Inside was what looked like a child's room. It had a bed shoved up against the wall, with a rose comforter. There were loads of frilly girly things and even a couple doilies. Sitting on the bed with her ankles crossed in the air was a younger version of Natalie. She had full bangs instead of them being parted to the side and she was slightly chubbier and shorter.

"Nat," Natalie greeted her with her old nickname.

Nat looked up surprised, her mouth falling into a perfect O. she threw aside the book, '_Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets,' _and started to jump up and down on the bed.

"Holy Cow," she screamed as she launched herself mid- jump.

Natalie managed to move to the side to evade her younger self's body. Nat hit her nose on the side of the door and promptly started to cry.

"Oh shut up," Natalie snapped, she was starting to regret her plan.

Nat glared up at her but it soon turned into a smile, "You came back! I knew that you wouldn't leave me down in this horrible hallway!" she threw herself around Natalie's legs. Natalie lost her balance for a moment, but quickly regained it. Nat started to jump up and down in front of her, speaking rapidly.

"I knew you would start the Fangirl thing again. I just knew it. I mean you locked me down her when you started to get flames, but I knew you would see the light and you would come back and continue some of our stories. Hey," Nat, if possible, brightened up even more, "Do you want to see you old OC's? They have been dying to see you!"

"Haven't they have disappeared yet?," Natalie had a sour expression on her face and looking like she was ready to punch her younger self.

"Naw, I held onto them for you! Hold on I can call them-."

"No!" Natalie slapped her hand over Nat's mouth, "Now Nat, I want you to listen to me and try not to interrupt finish my sentences. I'm going to bring you up to the control center soon and I'm going to let you have partial control of my mind. Now, make sure you listen very carefully, because we can't have you screwing up."

"So this is like a secret mission?" her eyes shone with excitement.

"Yeah something like that."

* * *

"Well, Mr. Spook?" Tom asked his sock puppet, "When do you think we should make our grand entrance?"

"Well Tom we only have one shot and I think we need to make it a grand one, so everyone will know it is you."

"I love the way you think Mr. Spook, although," her twirled a 'wand' in his long thin fingers, 'No one will doubt it is me if I use my Dark Mark charm."

"Excellent idea couldn't have thought of a better plan myself."

* * *

"How do you think she's doing?" Dale asked Erik as they sat outside.

"Right now she's in her head, letting her Fangirl in on the plan,' Erik answers him as he nervously tapped his foot.

"How do you know this?" Dale munched on some doughnuts that he managed to find in an abandoned bakery.

"We have a mental connection. Quite usefully when I'm away and she needs some inspiration," he threw an irritated glance at Dale, "and will you stop eating, we're on a mission."

"Man's gotta eat."

Erik's hand twitched to his Punjab lasso, but he managed to stop himself in time. After all now is not the time to strangle ones allies, that might present problems later on. Instead Erik continued his vigilante of the front of the building. He noticed that the entire square was empty.

"Where did they all go?"

"What?"

Erik pointed to the abandoned square, 'I swear it was full a minute ago, but you distracted me. How did they get out so fast?"

"Hell I don't know," Dale walked out into the sidewalk, "but I'm going to go get a closer look."

"Dale wait!" Erik shouted but he was too late.

A swarm of girls appeared out of the shadows and grabbed Dale and him. They were wearing all black and their golden hair was done up in long pony tails. They looked like Charlie's Angles.

Erik slapped his forehead and muttered, "Great".

* * *

"So how are we going to get out of this one Dumbly?" an imprudent student asked him.

Dumbledore paced in his spacious cell which he had to share with nine other people. He was pinching his long crooked nose, his glasses were held in one withered hand. Abruptly he stopped and clapped his hands together. He had a triumphant look in his eye and he opened his mouth to speak. He then closed his mouth and looked utterly loss.

"I've got nothing," he finally said as he crumbled in a heap on the floor.

"Oh well that's just great. The brightest wizard of our age can't come up with a plan," Malfoy sneered and fell to the ground, "We're screwed."

"Indeed we are," Minerva agreed with him.

Malfoy casted a furious glance at her, "You're screwed? They only want you for your brains. They want me for my body!" he shuddered and put his head in his hands, moaning and wallowing in self pity.

"You are the sorriest lot I have ever seen!" Hermione marched among them like general would his army, "Just because Dumbledore can't concoct a plan doesn't mean that no one can!"

She strolled up to Malfoy and grabbed his by his ear, "And Malfoy stop moaning about how the fangirl's want you for your body. They want Riddle more." She threw him against the bars and turned her attention to Dumbledore.

"And you., you are the greatest wizard of our age. Get you thick skull working and don't give up so easily."

"I've been at it for five hours!" came his indigent response, but Hermione ignored him and turned to Minerva.

"And you! You are the greatest witch of the century! You fought in the Final Battle. I have seen you take down many foes. You have no excuse!" She then turned her attention to the rest of the people in the cage, "I know we can do it! If we put our head together, we can use all of our abilities to the fullest and do this!"

Silence was greeted by her words, while ever one took in what she was saying. Suddenly Minerva jumped up.

"She's right we can do this." Dumbledore go up after her.

"I second that."

"I third it."

Various cries were heard around the cell, all agreeing with Hermione. The only one who was still sitting was Malfoy.

"Well…Draco?" Hermione asked.

Malfoy rolled his eyes and stood up, "I guess I don't have much to lose now do I?"

Hermione beamed at him as he moved to her left side. There was a moment of silence as the whole we-are-united- thing sunk in and took effect.

"So what do we do?" one person asked.

"Okay here's the plan," Hermione said as everyone huddled around each other. There was a special kind of closeness with them, kind of like the closeness of some football team that was in the states championship and on all of their bad players because all their good players went out the night before and got piss drunk and ended up lost in some woods out there were vampires came and destroyed the souls. It was that kind of special closeness.

* * *

Now ,just for a quick recap Dale and Erik are in the clutches of sexually frustrated teenagers, Natalie is stuck in her head in a dangerous land were anything is possible with the endless supply the sugar these girls seem to have. Tom is planning on taking over this fucked up convention/siege/hostile takeover with a sock puppet and all of our other main characters /Muses are trapped in cage having some special moment with each other and are trying to plan an escape that just might possible screw up everyone else's plans. Tune in next time to see how In the Land of Fangirls shall end. With the exception of an Epilogue.

* * *

**A/N: That's right there are two more chapters to go. I can't believe that it has gone on for this long. I'm proud of myself. I've made a semi decent story that earned me over 30 reviews. Tell you what if we can get to fifty, I'll create a bonus chapter after the epilogue. (slaps self at not so sneaky bribery) It was worth a shot. **


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